Last week I had a conversation with someone. This isn’t the first time I’ve had this conversation, and I doubt it will be the last. But what struck me was the source of this conversation. Usually, I have this conversation with folks who have a different set of beliefs than I do. Before I get off track about the beliefs, let me report the conversation.
Her: “You are very busy indeed!”
Me: “I always laugh when people tell me I’m busy. My ministry consists of writing, creating memes/graphics, creating and doing workshops, classes and retreats, and some private coaching. And a once a week online discussion group based on the Science of Mind textbook. I have time every day to either lounge around in the mornings watching the fat quail that hang out at our house, or to go horse back riding. And to nest. So...not too busy. Life is indeed rich and full but not too busy!”
Her: “Busy-ness is a state of mind which obviously I was projecting on you.”
And there-in lies the source of the busy comments I get all the time. It is more about them than about me. Even when that comment comes from someone I consider to be spiritually enlightened.
And right there is my opportunity to speak of beliefs.
I believe in living a rich and full life. I have some fears, I have some anxieties but I do not allow those to prevent me from doing what I wish to do. Nor do I allow them to keep me from showing up as how and whom I wish to show up in the world. (And where is my editor when I need her?)
I know where some of these beliefs came from. Enjoying life to the fullest: that belief came about as a result of doing the process of recovery, and realizing I did not get sober to plod through life. I got sober to enjoy life to the fullest.
The belief that one should do what one loves for a living, no matter whether there was money in it or not? I have no idea where that one came from. When I was a kid and pondering what to do with my life, every idea or suggestion I presented to the parental units was greeted the same way: “there’s no money in that,” they would say. As for me, it has never made sense to me to spend 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, doing something that I did not enjoy just to bring home a paycheck.
And my thought would be, “but there is no joy in what you are suggesting.”
I am a firm believer in “build it and they will come.” I’ve been self employed for most of my adult life, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. There is great freedom in being self employed. I have a flexible schedule, one that allows me to do all the things I love doing. That I get to do all the things I love doing is, I think, the source of all the “you’re so busy!” comments. There is a discipline involved in being self employed, for sure. I have to work, I have to produce, I have to write, no matter what. I have to ask for support and trust from people, so I can continue to do this work and get paid even before the book is published or the workshop done. I have to have faith and trust, and I have to renew that faith continuously. I still wouldn’t change it.
So no, I’m not busy. I am a great proponent of self care. I even have a workshop on self care. Most of the time I’m in balance with work, rest and play. What you believe is what you receive, and I believe that we should live lives of joy, doing what we love to earn a living, being able to play regularly, and being able to rest regularly. And that is what I do.
I know the “you’re so busy” comments will continue. I won’t tell them that speaks more to them than to me. People tend to get defensive and shut down when I do that. I see it as an opportunity for growth, but that’s just me I guess.
So today I’m going to write a bit more, nest a bit more, work a bit doing the things that set up a multiple source passive income stream, and just generally enjoy my day. Nope, not too busy.