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I’ll be blogging this but you get it first:

Is inner peace our birthright? Do we have an inherent right to inner peace simply because we exist? I don’t know if it is our birthright or not, but I can tell you this: peace is one of the attributes I request the most, particularly in the last 8 years.

And I know why I request this attribute. It’s because I believe I can’t do my work effectively if I am not at peace. This belief is the reason why self care is so important to me. If I want to be effective in the work I do in the world, I must be at peace.

Plus there’s that pesky little law of attraction that tells me I attract what I am. Which I believe to be true as well.

So I strive for peace when I don’t have it. When something pisses me off, I retreat to my cave to restore myself. That’s my first stop in self care. The next stop is processing: what am I feeling, allowing those feelings, expressing them in appropriate ways to allow them to move on out of here, then replacing those feelings with ones that once again allow me to go out into the world and do what is mine to do, effectively.

Repeat as necessary. And yes, it’s been necessary a lot since 2016. A lot.

But what if who I am, by nature of my birthright, means I can’t even begin to expect to be peaceful in this world? What if, by virtue of the color of my skin, I am faced with things that piss me off on a daily basis? On an hourly basis? How might that affect my beliefs? If I were a person of color, would peace even be on my list of things to do? Most likely not. Most likely I’d be more concerned with survival. Simple survival. Except it isn’t that simple. Simply walking out the door means, if you are a person of color, that you are entering a war zone. A place where you must constantly be on guard.

I know only a little of what that is like. As a woman, I know to be aware of my surroundings, to practice situational awareness. I know to always check the back seat of my car before getting into it. I know to always have some sort of weapon handy and to know how to use said weapon. I know some very basic defense moves. I am very aware that in a world in which many men think that women are second class citizens, I am considered prey by those men. Yeah, like most prey animals, I’m a little jumpy, especially when someone who thinks it’s ok to grab women by the pussy gets elected. When a predator gets elected. Which, if you haven’t connected the dots by now, is why it’s been necessary for me to repeat my little peace process since 2016. It’s when that pussy grabber got elected.

Why does this threaten me so much? Because we tend to emulate our leaders. This guy gets elected, and all of a sudden people have overt permission to behave as this guy behaves. They have permission to be bullies, to grope women, to belittle physically challenged people, to be judgmental, to use violence against people who disagree with them, to use more violence if they don’t get their way, to seek revenge, to carry the distorted and hateful message of white Christian nationalism. All of a sudden, the world is filled with people like this. They used to hide in the shadows. With that one election, all of a sudden they are coming out of the woodwork like super-cockroaches, no longer hiding in the dark but boldly standing in the light of day.

It’s no wonder I’m a bit jumpy. A bit prickly.

Now, if I were a different person, I would retaliate in kind. But I’m not. I’m a spiritual person. I live, breathe and move in spirituality. I believe in the power of unconditional love to heal all things. Oh, don’t get me wrong, if some bully threatens me I can and will defend myself; I have in the past and will do so again. By the way, those of you who think women should dress down so they don’t cause men to behave in inappropriate ways? Shame on you. Those of you who think boys will be boys? No. Teach those boys some respect, not that they have the right to accost a woman because she is dressed in a certain way. Those of you who think women who sleep around are sluts but men who do so are manly? Shame on you too. Those of you who think men are the head of the household? Nope. Not buying that one either. That one came from fragile men distorting the message of Jesus so they could shore up their delicate and large egos. And here I am, angry again. Yeah, prickly.

Let me try this again. Back to love. Breathing. Back to love. Ok, that’s better.

I believe in non-judgment, knowing that judging others ultimately hurts me more than anything else. I believe in forgiveness. I know the futility of attempting revenge and how opposite such a principle is to all of my beliefs. I know and believe in the concept of Oneness, and that it is thus my job to be peace and love as much as I can, because what I do and how I show up in the world does effect others. And quite frankly I’d rather affect them with love and peace than with bullying and judgment and revenge.

But the basic question remains, and is one I’ve been returning to: I’m white. I’m privileged because I don’t have to struggle to survive on a daily basis. The ism I experience is much more subtle than the ism people of color experience. They get blatant attempts on their very lives. I saw a postcard the other day that showed about a dozen black people, all dead, hanging from trees. A postcard! This morning I saw a video in which some white guy was talking about being white meant to be both a savior and a conqueror. He talked about white America and said this country was designed for them. And I got FURIOUS hearing that bullshit. That utter nonsense. The arrogance!

And I expressed my anger and a person who I respect responded to my comment with this quote from James Baldwin:

"To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time."

Yeah. So I’m privileged. I’m not in a rage most of the time. Only part of the time.

And yeah, self care is a big fat hairy deal. Because we can’t go out in the world and expect to do effective work if we are angry.

So this is what I am up to now. Self care and social justice. The two go hand in hand. We cannot do our work effectively in this world unless we care for ourselves first.


In Christianity, a superficial understanding of prayer is that it is a beseeching to an outside entity.  This idea of prayer is so ingrained in our culture that even people who claim not to be Christian, who replace the word God with the word Universe, still beseech to an outside entity.  They say things like, “I’ve asked the Universe to help me with this.”  

This superficial understanding of prayer has never worked for me.  I’ve always felt “victimy” praying to an outer entity, and always felt like there was something missing with those prayers.  The reality is that prayer goes much deeper than simply asking a God separate from us to do something for us.  The reality of prayer is that it has the power to change us from the inside out, and when we change, our world changes.  

In Science of Mind, Ernest Holmes says that prayer “changes the mind of the one doing the praying.”  And in the Bible, it calls us to “pray without ceasing.”

How is one to pray without ceasing?  And what is the real power behind prayer?  I believe that prayer is a guiding light, not something to be used when we are in need.  Prayer is a way of being, not words.  The traditional way of praying is a very good start.  Now let’s take it a bit further.

If we are called to pray without ceasing, it means we are called to BE prayerful, 24/7.  Prayer, in a deeper sense than the beseeching sense, means communion.  It means connection.  I’m sure you have had times in your life when you felt disconnected.  Alone.  Lonely.  Loneliness is not about a lack of people in our lives.  It is about being and feeling disconnected from that beautiful power that exists in this world, that Power that is everywhere present.  The reality is we can not be disconnected from It, because It really is everywhere present.  We’ve just shut ourselves off from It.  

We shut ourselves off from It by judging others.  We shut ourselves off from It by hatred.  We shut ourselves off from It by putting up walls of defense.  We shut ourselves off from It by acting in ways which run counter to our deepest beliefs and values.  And when we shut ourselves off from It, It never goes away.  It just affirms our way of being, because that, in essence, is what we have been praying for.  It always says yes.  So we judge and hate and build walls and separate ourselves further from It by separating ourselves from our fellow humans.  We live in terms of us and them.  And we get lonelier, and sicker, and more and more hateful and judgmental, and we wonder how God could be doing the things he is doing?  And then we shut ourselves off from God even more because now we are mad at Him.

I am finding it necessary to take a deep breath now.  Breathe.  Breathe out that pain and misery born of ignorance, and breathe in relief, and truth, and the love of God.

Because in reality that is really what God is.  It is love.  That’s all.  But that is quite a bit.  It covers everything.  In some circles there are seven qualities,  or attributes, of Spirit that are mentioned.  Those attributes are love,  light, peace, power, joy and beauty.

I’m going to make an assumption here and assume that you believe that God is indeed everywhere present.  Another way of putting it is that there is no place where God is not.  No place.  You are here.  And if there is no place where God is not, then God is in you.  

I’m going to make another assumption and assume that you believe that the qualities of God are indeed love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty.

If you believe that there is no place where God is not, and if you believe that the qualities of God are love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty, then you must also believe that YOU are made of love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty.   And if you believe in what the Bible says, then you believe that the way to pray is 24/7, without ceasing.  

If you believe all that, then the way to pray is to embody those qualities of love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty.  All day.  Every day.  As best as you can.  This is the mystical and very deep power of prayer.  When we strive to pray like this, prayer does indeed change the mind of the one doing the praying.

In Sanskrit, prayer means seeing oneself as wonderfully made.  How much more wonderful can you get than to think of yourself as the essence of love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty?  

I am reminded of the prayer of St. Francis of Assisi.  You may know it as the 11th step prayer if you are a 12 stepper.  This prayer goes like this:  

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me bring love.
Where there is offense, let me bring pardon.
Where there is discord, let me bring union.
Where there is error, let me bring truth.
Where there is doubt, let me bring faith.
Where there is despair, let me bring hope.
Where there is darkness, let me bring your light.
Where there is sadness, let me bring joy.
O Master, let me not seek as much
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love,
for it is in giving that one receives,
it is in self-forgetting that one finds,
it is in pardoning that one is pardoned,
it is in dying that one is raised to eternal life.

The prayer begins with a beseeching to an outside entity, but then, it moves deeper.  It asks for us to become peace.  It asks for us to become love instead of hatred.  It asks for us to forgive instead of perpetuating the offense.  It asks for us to bring harmony to discord.  It asks for us to speak the truth.  What truth?  OUR truth!  This calls for an extraordinary level of self awareness, which calls for a regular practice of introspection, which is another form of prayer, and the topic of which could be another talk or blog post.  Back to the prayer.  This prayer calls us to replace our doubts with faith, our despair with hope.  It calls for us the Be the light, shining on the darkness of hatred and judgement and bigotry and shame.  It calls for us to be joyful.  It calls for us to turn away from such self centered and selfish motives as wanting consolation, understanding and love and to turn towards consoling others, loving others and understanding others.  And it tells us that when we do this, we find ourselves, our true selves.  Thus that old self, that lonely miserable old self, dies, and we reawaken to an eternal life that is filled with so much love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty that we sometimes wonder about it.  How can I, a lowly human, be filled with so much love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty?

And here’s the kicker to this prayer:  it is in giving that one receives.  In Science of Mind we call this the Law of Attraction.  This law says that what we give, we receive.  I find it somewhat ironic that we are back to where we began, beseeching to an outside entity, only now we have received that which we have asked for, because we have become that which we have asked for.

So go out into the world.  BE love, light, peace, power, joy and beauty.  Every time you find yourself judging, remember.  Every time you find yourself separating yourself from the sunlight of the Spirit by building walls of us and them, tear down those walls.  Every time you find yourself hating something or someone, replace that hatred with love.  Every time you discover an example of sadness, bring some joy to it.  Every time you want to participate in feeding disharmony by choosing a side, instead seek to understand.  BE the voice and the example of Spirit in your every action and your every thought.  Allow to die a natural death pessimism and negativity, and replace that with optimism and positive thinking.  

And watch your life resurrect into something new and wonderful; and what you have prayed for manifest.

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Yesterday was Chinese New Year. It is the year of the pig. Unfortunately I have no pig photos for you. I even know a pig. His name is Winston. Winston apparently likes his belly scratched, but he is also a bit wary of strangers, so I have yet to experience the pleasure of scratching his rather large belly. The last time I saw Winston, his mama had put him on a diet and Winston was not a happy pig.

However, it is said that most pigs are happy, as well as good tempered, kind hearted, positive and loyal. And prosperous. I guess that accounts for Winston needing to go on a diet. He has an abundance of food!

If you are wondering whether this is going to just be a rambling about pigs, not to worry. I’ve got a point; two actually. It’s just taking me a while to get there. First point: You get a do-over. It is New Year’s all over again. How are you doing on those resolutions which never work? Take the do-over. Or did you take my advice and set intentions instead of resolutions?

Either way, you get a do over. Thank the Chinese for it.

The other point of my post is the prosperity piece. Pigs are a symbol of prosperity. Now, I did a bit of research, as I like to do, and discovered that this prosperity thing only applies under certain conditions. If if you were born in a year of the pig, watch out. Apparently, not so much prosperity coming for you. What are those years you say? According to Wikipedia, they are: 1947, 2031, 1995, 1971, 1923, 1935, 2007, 2019, 1983, 1959. Don’t ask about the 2031. I have no clue.

But here’s the thing. I’m a Science of Mind New Thought kind of person. This means I believe in the power of thought and the Law of Attraction. This means that if we set an intention for prosperity, then prosperity we shall have. Of course, there is a lot of other stuff that goes into that, but I’m just going to leave that right here for you.

Today, you get a do-over on New Years, and you can rely on the pig. Go for it. Prosperity.

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I am a huge believer in the Law of Attraction.  This Law says basicallly that we attract what we put out there.  Like other Laws, this Law is no respecter of what we do, or what color we are, or any other outside appearances.  It doesn't say we attract what we wish for, or even what we affirm.  What it really does is bring to us in accordance with our beliefs.  And expectations, like thoughts and feelings and emotions, are very much based in our beliefs.

Some like to say that expectations are premeditated resentments.  Those who subscribe to this tend to lower their expectations so they don't get upset about things. ...continue reading "Expectations are NOT premeditated resentments!"

11709981_10207274755486543_7958070936812802295_oI've been doing a lot of thinking lately on how the basic laws of life work.  You may have heard about one of those laws:  it's called the Law of Attraction.  Almost every spiritual, scientific, philosophical and psychological discipline throughout the ages has either proven or spoken of this law.

It is powerful, and it works.  It works even if you don't believe in it, because it will simply honor your intention of disbelief and not work. ...continue reading "Three steps to activate the Law of Attraction in your life"

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Grumpy much?

Being a grump really doesn't feel very good, nor does it serve us very well.  There is a reason for that age old saying, "you catch more flies with honey than vinegar."

Setting aside, for the moment, the question of why one would want to catch flies anyway, let's examine this concept a bit.

First of all, we all know that what we embody, what we be, what we do, what we put out there.....is what we attract.  Right?  If you don't know this, or don't believe it, try an experiment.  Go to the grocery store and be rude.  Steal a parking place, don't make way in the aisles, take cuts at the check out line, and whatever you do.....don't smile at anyone.  Check out how that feels, and check out how people reacted to you.

Now go back in the store.  Smile and make eye contact at everyone you encounter.  Help a short person reach the item on the top shelf.  Let the person behind you in the check out line with just a couple of items go in front of you.  Check out how that feels, and check out how people reacted to you.

If that isn't enough to prove the concept, do your research.  Don't just check out Law of Attraction sites, which can admittedly be biased.  Check out some quantum physics.  Check out the "observer effect."

It really is true, we attract what we put out there.  In terms of feeling grumpy,  simply smiling could change all that.

If you did the experiment above, you've already seen that smiling will completely change the way people act towards you.

Now try this:

Smile.  All the time.  Even if you don't feel like it.  People will wonder what you are up to.  And I guarantee it will make you feel better.

And try counting how many smiles you see in a set period of time.  Go ahead, count those smiles!  For an hour a day.  Write down how many you get.  Do this every day for a week.

Then see how you feel.

It's true:  we can change our feelings by smiling.  It's a behavior modification technique that is simple, easy to do, and very effective.